Monday, June 30, 2008

Adventures in Laundro-land

As my better half posted previously, we've been spending some time at the laundromat.  We will be spending more time there if we don't find us one-a-them warshing machines soon.*  The most recent stint was spent by yours truly and was my first experience at such a venue.  Contrary to my expectations, however, I did not leave the place feeling dirtier (as I do most of Buffalo's public places inhabited by the poor and lowly) then when I entered--nor did my clothes.  This is what I like to call a success!  In fact, I dare say, I actually enjoyed my visit to the laundromat.  Who wouldn't want to wash and dry several loads of laundry all at the same time while watching Ellen on a fuzz-less** television?  Exactly.  The down side?  You have to pay to ride this ride.  That being said, I will tell you what else I saw (Ellen wasn't the only entertainment on the docket, my friends) and you can tell me if would be worth it to you to pay $3.00 a load to see (and do) such things: 

1.  A man donned in a baby blue velour jogging suit (complete with bling and afro) strut his stuff around the joint as if he owned the place.  Then later see him strutting his shirtless self around the joint and begin to think, maybe he does own the place because it is not that hot outside.  Only to find out that he did not, in fact, own the place, but just needed to wash the shirt off his back as I witnessed him pulling the shirt out of the dryer, sniffing it, and apparently satisfied with its freshness, replacing it on his torso.  Literally ALL of his laundry was done.  Although, that was the only piece of laundry I actually saw him with the entire two hours I was there...

2.  A nice girl, friend of Baby Blue (I know not if they were friends prior to this outing, but three shared nicotine breaks later?  Buddies for life) needed to wash her sneakers.  A quick cycle from the industrial strength machine and they were ready for the dryer.  Unfortunately (for whom, I'm not sure) as the now clean sneakers (and other apparel) tumbled 'round n'  'round in the dryer, they kept knocking the door open, sending items, including iddy-biddies, flying through the air onto the tile below.  She, having stepped outside for one of the aforementioned "breaks", was oblivious to the lacy pink scandal that lay about the floor.  I looked around to see who was watching.  No one.  Good.  Then, turning my gaze to what lay at my feet, I contemplated, Do I pick it up? It's a thong!  A pink lacy thong!  Stream of consciousness continued:  Of course, it has just been washed.  I can't just pretend I didn't see it, it's RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Having already seen a man perform a similar deed for her the first time the dryer door bounced open (though, I am certain he did it more for his own pleasure than anything), I decided I would do the same samaritous act.  WWJD.  Thumb and forefinger in position, I bent over, plucked the lacies from the ground and returned them to their home, suppressing the urge to gag and shudder.  There, I thought as I dusted off my hands.

3.  Ever wonder how the African American male is able to walk whilst his trousers slink around his thighs?  Well, let me tell you:  After Baby Blue was again fully clothed (see #1) , I watched him take the front of his excruciating large velour pants (did I mention they were baby blue?) tie the drawstring loosely, take a safety pin, and--wait for it--fasten the front and center of the waistband to his boxers.  Thus, leaving the rear of his pants to sag ever so deliberately beneath his buttocks.  Who'd a thunk?  I say, pure unadulterated genius. 

Until next time, I'm Abby Jane.  Tune in next week for more adventures in laundro-land, as we still have not a washing machine.* 

*How is one supposed transport a washing machine(s) found for screaming deals on Craig's list to its new home in a 1999 Toyota Corolla?  Exactly.
**our current T.V. status is such:   CW, Fox=clear as day; ABC=watch-able, but snowy; NBC, CBS=non-existent (ba-bye Oprah).

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Shrinkage

I'm blogging from the comfort of my shrink's office and it is fantastic. Yes, that's right; I'm seeing a shrink. In fact, our whole family has been seeing this shrink for about a month now and I have to tell you that I am completely satisfied. I only have one picture of our shrink, and it's not that good, but it will have to suffice for now. I'm sure we will post some more later.
Here:
Ours is the one on the upper left. Ahhh...just looking at it makes me happy inside.
And in an extremely random turn of events, the upper right will belong to our new friends Taylor and Laney. I came across the said's blog while doing a search for JD/MUP programs on google. I saw that they were planning to move from Utah to Buffalo for the JD/MUP (law and urban planning joint degree), and, after having a bad draw on our first hand of house, we thought we could give them some help finding an apartment. When the place next door opened up we let them know about it because they seem really cool and we thought it would be nice for both of us to have neighbors in the ward. Furthermore, the houses are pretty close together so we also figure that if anyone is going to see us in our skivvies, they might as well know what they are, right?
I digress. Back to the shrink thing
So if you're wondering what on earth I'm talking aboot, I will fill you in. If you're not, I'm filling anyway so you might want to skip down. A few months ago we heard that our friends the Calls (who happen to be super rad) were unfortunately moving from Buffalo. The only silver lining in the entire situation, besides the fact that they were going on to greener pastures to graze on a six digit income, was that their apartment (which happens to be almost as rad as the Calls themselves) was going to be available to rent. Well, to make a long story short, we jumped all over it and now we are living here. We labeled the house "Our Shrink" because we were certain that once we moved in it would solve all of our problems. It has. Does that make us worldly? I will be posting a video tour of our sweet penthouse once we get the pictures hung. They are still collecting dust, so don't hold your breath.

Shout out to the Calls - We owe you BIG TIME!!! Good luck in El Paso. And by the way, thanks for leaving us all of that cool stuff!

We're not going to miss our old shanty, but we will miss our friends:
Perry will especially miss her friends (notice her face). Let me also make mention of the sweetest car I ever saw in the hood parked in the background. What is that line about your wheels being worth more than your car?
And finally, how 'boot a couple pics of Thing 1 and Thing 2 for good measure:

Her busy little fingers kept grabbing the camera string while I was taking her picture.

My babes!


I don't know if the experience lived up to the anticipation.






Monday, June 23, 2008

Blogging Hiatus

To our faithful readers, we apologize. Most of you who know the Jeff and Abby McIntier family know that we roll to the pace of a slower clock, and it takes us four times the length to complete tasks that you normal people do in a week (and my mom in a day or two). As a witness of this, the pictures that are to be hung on our bare walls have been collecting dust on the ground for nearly three weeks. Oh. If that sentence didn't make sense...we moved!! Hooray! More to come on this later.

With that said, it will probably be a few more days until we get the internet hooked up at the new pad, or as we like to refer to it, "Our shrink." More to come on that later. (Am I hooking you?) Luckily we have found that the local Maytag Laundry has a free wireless internet connection. so here I sit, typing away in the car, as the object of some awkward stares from the employees. Oh, to have no shame!

So here is the brief update:

We LOVE LOVE LOVE our new place!

We are beginning to LOVE Buffalo. I took up the hobby of getting into some of the architectural history here (of which there is a surplus) and have been quite impressed. More to come.

The economists are right; people respond to incentives. After searching high and low and far and wide, we have finally discovered the carrot that errorlessly leads Max to the potty hole! More to come.

I just got the low battery sign, and if I don't post this it won't get done for days (see above). I'm going to have to stop right there. Talk to you soon!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

What a great mom

Sorry Abby, Charlotte and Nicea. I think that you moms are great too, but this post happens to be about another great mom that lives in Buffalo.

So I'm driving down Main Street in Buffalo and I see this gangster looking kid with his cornrows and baggy clothes standing on the side of the road holding a bright neon-orange sign. My first thought was that he was soliciting work or something, so I slowed down to read the sign. We made eye contact and he sheepishly looked away from me, so my eyes drifted down to the sign:

"I WILL NOT STEAL OR LIE TO MY MOM!"

HAHA! What a great mom!!! The best part was that this mom-of-the-year candidate was sitting back behind her son and off to the side, reading a book in a lawn chair! Oh what I would have given for a camera!

On a more serious note, it was reassuring to me to see a mom doing her job as a parent! Abby and I have met a few parents that probably would have stormed into a convenience store and insisted that their kid would never do something like that if they got caught stealing. Then they would follow it up with a rant about how the store set them up because they are out to get teenage kids. Finally, they would top it off with a threat to file a character defamation lawsuit if the accusing employee didn't quit their job and leave the country!

Good work mom! We need more like you!